Sliced My Skin

He was the only one
who saw right through me,
the only one who sliced my skin
to the specimen beneath;
his little crystal catastrophe.
My heart pumped in place,
squirting blood through my body,
crimson threads watched carefully
through translucent sliding doors.
He saw what no one cared to see;
no one dared to dance so close.
He broke me open,
a puzzle of a thousand pieces,
each assembly never quite
fitting as before;
his lopsided lover.

When the morning moans
in waking limbs,
he will fly on metal wings
away from me.
His carry-on carries my confidence,
my fractured figments he could not
fit inside the baggage so
carefully folded and checked.
A porcelain tear traps
my frozen face;
even ice statues stain scarlet.



Yesterday, I brewed my own coffee. On Monday night, I went to Caribou Coffee and bought a Mocha Java blend. In the morning I used my little coffee maker an old co-worker gave me when she left. I measured out the blend, added water to the maker, and pushed the "on" button. Soon enough, I had a delicious smelling aroma filling my cubicle. I poured myself a cup, added some creamer, whipped cream and caramel, and away I went. But I wasn't sure if it was good coffee. I usually go for the lattes and mochas, the stuff with milk and sugar and flavor, so I wasn't sure how coffee was really supposed to taste. So I asked my co-worker Bev if she wanted any, and I poured her a cup. She tried it out and said it was good, and that I had gotten the hang of it.

Success!! I'm very proud of myself in so many ways- for not stopping at Starbucks, for brewing my own, and turning out a decent pot of coffee, at that. I read something on my Compassion International newsletter that struck me- that if I cut down on one latte purchase, I could use that money to donate to charity, to donate to a worthy cause and help someone who really needs that money. I'm going to try and do that- if I cut down on my Starbucks even a few times a week, that money will pile up and I can give to one of the groups Compassion helps with. I'm going to try. So far, I've cut back twice in the past two days. That's already practically $10 I've saved, $10 that will help someone waiting to be heard and helped.


Now It's Day 2 of my coffee making adventure, and I still made a good pot! So, unless it's a 2 day fluke, I can brew a mean cup'a joe. I'm still really, really proud of myself, as stupid as it sounds. I don't know why I'm so excited about this. I really don't. But I haven't gotten excited about anything in a very long time so I'm going to take this newfound emotion and run with it :)